Little Sister

You ever get some day's that seem to roll over really well, even with little effort? (And yes, it's possible!)

Yesterday went better than expected. I got to spend most of the day with my little sister. My mom handed us some cash and we went to the mall to get some supplies like a new pair of shoes (sweet!), and some little trinkets for the little lady who would be with me. Half of the cash went into the new shoes I needed, and the rest went into lunch, my sisters stuff, and a few "little things" that some how added up to $20. Either way, it was great to actually spend some quality time with my sister because it seems like we don't do it much together. She often mentioned that I spend more time with my friends than I do with her, and I'm her only sibling at home now. As much as I didn't want to hear it, she was absolutely right, so it felt really good to spend some one-on-one time with her.

I enjoyed hearing her say, "Thank you" at random moments. It makes a man feel fuzzy on the inside, if that were possible...

The second day was no different. I spent some more time with her at the mall again. This time we didn't do much shopping, and I was thankful for that. I'm at that stage where I'm seriously watching how I spend, which is a good thing I suppose.

We recounted the uselessness of little trinkets in the local Hello Kitty store, considered the recklessness of a man who ran through the walk ways with hands flailing in the air, and observed nature at it's finest with two little puff ball puppies scrapping it out in a play pen. Apparently there was a dispute between them on who would play with the third puppy.

I love those little times where my sister would open up to me with inquisitive questions like, "Teach me more about this stuff...", "Why do some people etc...", I have a friend at school and..." To me, they are the evidence of a young woman growing in the world around her. She's finding her way around, and I plan on helping her do that. I've loved growing closer to her, and I don't plan on stopping.

So about College and Starbucks...

"Hey Jorge, thanks for calling. I have one more question I wanna ask. You mentioned that you were going to college this fall?"

"Well, if I get accepted, yeah."

"Umm, ok. We only hire people if they can stay for one year or more. By the time you go to college this fall, it'll be too soon, only six months."

"Oh... ok... So if I don't get accepted, then uh, can I call you back?"

"Yeah! We'll definitely have a place for you here if you want to call back, so don't worry. I'm sure that if you do go to college, other stores will gladly take you!"

A lot of things rested on whether or not college was my soon-to-be future. I was hoping that God would somehow plop me into an apartment in Chicago where I could study and hopefully be thrown into a future of vocational Ministry. After all, that's why I signed up for Bible School.

I was almost convinced that God wanted me to go to Moody, or at least something like it. In the last year things seemed to click together, guiding me to this decision. I thought God was going to let me go and "broaden my horizons" in this field. But I knew in my heart, deep down, that there was always a possibility of the college saying, "No." So I allowed room in my heart to accept that possibility. It's a good thing I did too...

A week after the Starbucks interview, I finally received a letter from the Moody Bible Institute. I put my finger in between the flap and the letter, and just before I tore it open, I stopped. Putting the letter on my lap and looking out my window, I prepared my self for what might be a great day, or a sad one. "God," I prayed, "I don't know what's in this letter, but what ever it is, please prepare my heart to accept what your desire is in all of this."

I didn't get accepted. I re-read it all just to take it in again. Now this is the part where the person starts asking "why?" They get to a certain point where their emotions pour out. But for some reason I was actually fine with it. I was fine with not going to Moody because God seemed to imply that there was another place that was more important for me to be. After I read it, I put it back on my lap and said, "Thank you God, for not letting me go to a place you didn't want me to be."

I put the letter to the side and continued with my day until I sat down for dinner.

"Hey mum, how was your day?"

"Ok. Work was heavy. You?"

"It was fine, I guess... Umm... Yeah, I got a letter today."

"Oh yeah? From who?"

"College."

Looking surprised, "Oh really? Did you read it?"

"Uhh yeah. I didn't get accepted."

I've had to break the news to a number of people, all of who were upset. But that's ok, because I'm at peace with it.

This is the beautiful part about having a relationship with God. Trusting God to help make life changing decisions will take the stress off your back. Your not really worried about big things, because you already know God has it under His control.

In the end things still turned out just fine. I got a new job at Starbucks (and I am not disappointed by any means!), I get to stay home with my family, I get to still see my friends, and I can still be part of my church.

So I didn't get accepted... That's ok. There's always next year right? Besides, It's not like I have to go now. I know some people who went to college in their 30's and they're doing just fine. I am not worried.

The God who formed the mountains with his finger tips, and holds the seven seas in the palms of his hands... Amazingly that God is my Father, and He will see me to the beautiful end. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. :)

Sacrificial love (in a small way this time)

There's always an opportunity to share Gods love. Even in the waking hours of the morning.

I was working at my job all night and I looked forward to getting home for some sleep. I stopped by the bank to deposit my check and filled up on gas and drove home. It was 6 AM, the butt-crack of dawn.

As usual, I always check my Facebook just before I go to bed. Ironically, there just happened to be my friend from around the world who conveniently began chatting with me.

She began with, "How are you doing?" along with other general ice breakers. With that, she began asking questions about my faith and about my stance on certain issues. Now let me explain something here. I'm tired, and I really want to go to bed. After lifting boxes all night, my bed was feeling really comfortable. But I realized that I was being extremely selfish. This was a golden opportunity! This person wants to know stuff about God, and I have answers! The only thing holding me back from showing her Gods love were my selfish sleepy desires.

So as tired as I was, I happily answered her many questions. Was I exhausted? You bet. But did I enjoy it? Absolutely. I slept happily that morning. :)

There is a joy that I get when I am involved in Ministry. I just need a different job so that I can be more free to get into it. Ha!

She said, "Don't force me! Such a thing should not be done..."

"...But he would not listen to her, and being stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her."

Those are some pretty strong words right there, but that's exactly what this guy did. While King David was still alive, his oldest son Amnon took fancy to his half-sister, Tamar. The law back then condemns such vile things; 'Do not have sexual relations with the daughter of your father's wife, born to your father; she is your sister', (Lev. 18:11). Now as disgusting and ridiculous as this is, Amnon apparently thought it'd be fine to trick her into thinking he was bed-ridden.

Basically the story goes down like this: Amnon goes crazy over his half-sister, Tamar. So he basically tricks her into thinking that he's ill. So she's doing the nice sister thing by baking him food. As soon as she comes to feed him, he grabs hold of her and basically say's that he wants to sleep with her. She starts to protest because she doesn't want that kind of icky relationship (what girl would?). Amnon ignores her and then rapes her... But it doesn't end there. After he's had his way with her, he say's in anger, "Get up! Go!" To which she replied, "No, my brother! Sending me away like this is worse than what you just did to me!"

Now here's a little background to fill in the details: In Israeli law (back then), if you raped a virgin woman, then you were responsible for her well being in one way or another.

If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife. If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he must still pay the bride-price for virgins. (Exodus 22:16-17)

I get the feeling that King David wouldn't have given Tamar over to the brother who just raped her. So even though King David wouldn't have given his daughter to a brother/rapist, Amnon would have to still pay the bride price anyway.

The reason why this story irked me so badly was because Amnon was going to throw Tamar out like Garbage, which would have only deepened the blade in her wounds. One thing I learned from this story is this:

-Don't have sexual relations with any relatives (Obviously, that's just disgusting)
-If you make a big mistake, deal with it. Don't try to throw it away as if it didn't have any value.
-If you destroy a persons life, do the best you can with the situation (especially if the person you hurt is willing to reason with you!)

When you make a mess, you have to own up to it and do your best to clean it. Take some responsibility!

Eventually Tamar's brother kills Amnon, most likely out of revenge for what he did to his sister. So I guess he got what he deserved. Good riddance. King David didn't need an incestuous rapist in his palace anyways.

*Story is found in 2 Samuel chapter 13